Bog-Standard Britain By Quentin Letts

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Bog-Standard Britain is a bog-standard diatribe about just those subjects one would design a Daily Mail columnist to diatribe about: domestic correctness, the decrease of great manners, informal accents on the BBC, swat music, complicated art, Brussels, Germaine Greer, men with shaved heads and egalitarianism in all the forms.

To take such drearily predicted element and spin it in to something value reading, a great understanding of wit, subtlety, and excellent essay would have been needed, but these qualities are in desperately short supply here. Quentin Letts" attempts at puns are young in the impassioned (Jade Goody was "the Duncing Queen") and his bludgeoning make use of irascibility would be regarded as clumsy even from a teenager. His logging deployment of strained similes ("disappearing as fast as a mermaids kneecaps", "as focussed as a gynaecologists forefinger") provokes not smiles but sighs of despair. Harrumphing ejaculations ("Come, come!"; "Oh, the shame") and ossified periphrases ("the fairer sex") strengthen the feeling that one isnt celebration of the mass a book by a genuine chairman at all, but a satirists mimic initial cousin to Craig Browns Wallace Arnold.

"I write letters with a soda soda fountain pen," Letts confides. "I gloss my shoes." But a extraordinary antithesis is that nonetheless Letts argues the need for such "civility and gentlemanly conduct", he feels entitled to be as bold as he likes about those of whom he disapproves. And sadly, his reproach is not inventive. Russell Brand is a "jerk", Simon Shaps is a "twerp", Germaine Greer is "loose-knickered" and a "freckly Sheila", Ed Balls is a "bulgy-eyed berk".

I"m fearful that Bog-Standard Britain is a rubbish of everyones time, and Letts would have been improved in use polishing his boots and inditing letters with his soda soda fountain pen. Still, he is right that there are a series of things wrong with complicated Britain. This book is one of them.

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